What we are born with?

Do you see dead bird bodies sometimes on the road or in a park? A bird that died due to heat, predator attack or illness or any other factor. As adults, we conveniently ignore this right? But I remember, as a child, whenever we (myself and group of friends) saw a dead bird in our locality, we use to dig a hole on the ground and burry the bird.

Looking back, I often wonder what made us do that.

No, this post is not about birds… 

This is actually about what we learn as child. We, at age of 7-8 years already knew that the dead bodies must be burned or buried, otherwise the soul wander around, it doesn’t get peace even after death.

Yes, our action back then shows compassion toward that poor bird but looking back I am wondering why it was so important for a very young child to know that there is peace after death and one can get that if their dead bodies are burned or buried with respect, performing all rituals for religion they believe and for society. And then, there is concept of heaven and hell. Donating seems to be greatest virtue of an individual, a gate pass to the heaven. 

Our societal rituals also consider Kanya daan (donating your daughter to her husband during marriage ceremony) as the maha daan (greatest donation). But the phrase itself quietly suggests something troubling: that a daughter is something that can be “given away.” And traditionally its the father or uncle who performs this ritual, the mother does not have the right to do Kanya daan. 

We grew up observing all these things.

But then a question arises...

What is that we are born with?

I am born with brain (Central Nervous System), heart (Circulatory System) and eight other integrated systems that practically runs my body. These are truly mine, because they came with my birth. This is all that I own. Everything else I acquire from the world. I do not own my female child, I just gave birth to her. She is an individual with her own body, mind and soul…

The only thing any of us truly owns is ourselves. And if that is the case, then the only thing we can truly donate is our own body. Everything else is temporary, accumulated during our time in this world. Take blood, for example. The blood in my veins can only live for approximately 120 days, it doesn’t stay there for lifetime. And when I donate blood, I am getting it replenish within 24 hours.  Blood is something that you own, donating blood is one of the few acts where we truly give something that is part of us—and it can save multiple lives.

In that sense, it is a donation that is both deeply personal and profoundly practical.

I have taught my 6 year old daughter that when I die, my body goes to a hospital. My husband knows that no last rituals are to be done for me, I don’t want him to skip non-vegetarian food for 13 days just because I died. Instead, I hope that my body may help others continue living, all my vital organs which can be transplant should go to the needed and rest of body is for medical students for practical demonstration. I don’t need any last ritual, and I sincerely hope my family remember this as my last wish.  

If my life can help someone while I am alive, and my body can help someone after I am gone, that would be enough.