Growing and learning in challenging times…

I still remember the day when I took my 6 month old daughter for a regular check-up at doctor’s clinic and the doctor suggested going for an MRI scan as her head circumference was little below the average number and I changed her doctor. I didn’t want my child to be exposed to (safe) magnetic radiation that is actually not safe for pregnant women as you see in posters outside any clinic.

You must be thinking why I did so?

As I was on maternity leaves, I have spent these six months with her. She somehow developed the habit of sucking her thumb. Once, while playing with a torch light, I removed her thumb from the mouth and simultaneously switched on the torch light, as soon as she put her thumb back into her mouth, I switched off the light…pulled her thumb out and switch on the light…and this continued for few rounds. Afterward, when she put her thumb inside the mouth, the light went off and when she removed her thumb out and I switched on the light, and when she again put it inside the mouth, the light was off. She very spontaneously linked the switching “on and off” of the torch light with her putting her thumb “in and out”. This child definitely doesn’t need an MRI scan just because her head circumference was a little below the average number.

Let me talk about another number called Intelligence Quotient or IQ. It is the number to measure human intelligence, but do you know the test for IQ is a combination of verbal, numerical, logical and spatial reasoning. I still don’t understand the purpose of testing IQ but now a days I see a lot of attention on another factor called Emotional Quotient or Emotional Intelligence i.e. capability of individuals to recognise their own emotions and those of others, discern between different feelings, and label them appropriately, and manage and/or adjust emotions to adapt to environments or achieve one's goal(s).

We often link academic performance with intelligence which certainly is not true in the same way the measurement of head circumference was not linked to the brain functioning of my daughter. 

My daughter is soon to be five years old – a happy and healthy child, who can do many of her daily tasks independently. Further she can express her feeling and have the courage to ask difficult questions like “mumma do you love daddy? I saw you both fighting the other day.” So, I believe her IQ/EQ numbers are good. 

We often like to measure everything with numbers, above/below average; high/low; good/bad, etc. But life and happiness are certainly beyond these numbers. 

Learning is not something that happens only in school or college, it's rather a life long process.

We are currently going through a tough time due to Covid 19. Home schooling and online class will continue to be part of our life for quite sometime. We were forced to jump into the system of e-learning but after being there for more than six months, its time that we evaluate how beneficial or harmful it can be for our children. I can only talk about my soon to be 5 year old daughter who is studying in Kinder Garden.

Soon after the government announced closure of schools, she had to start with online schooling every alternate day. It was indeed super tough for her as just few days ago her teacher was Simram mam (for class Nursery) and now we told her that Shweta mam is her teacher. How can we explain promotion to next class to a child who is not going to school (the lockdown started in March – bad timing for kids).

It certainly took a long to accept Shweta mam as her teacher, as there is absolutely no teacher-student interaction. And no one to blame here as teachers were also forced to start online classes without any formal training. And it was now the time for summer vacation. Well, it was a relief for both of us but the learning continued. We did lots of things including learning numbers and shapes by making this animated movie.

The school reopened after summer break, now they have 50 mins classes everyday and they have to wear school uniform too. But I was happy as teachers were now comfortable using online medium. Moreover, the new time table has music, dance, art classes also. Soon, the MHRD announced that the duration of the class is to be restricted to 30 mins for pre-primary and the first thing to be removed from the new time table was the extra-curricular activities.

Now, the focus is on learning numbers, words, making verbal sentences in English. Is it realistic for a 4-5 year old child to pay attention to an online class in which all of a sudden, someone starts presenting their screen and my child is lost, where parents are arguing with the teacher, where at times, due to connectivity issue there is a lag of good 15-20 seconds. Further, neither the teachers nor most of the parents acknowledge that burden the little child has on his/her shoulders.

My daughter, at times, feels bad because of her inability to answer correctly. She only tells me that other children know the answer and she doesn’t. I, myself, have never compared her with other students but despite all the issues of an online class, she is intelligent enough to understand what the teacher is hinting her at. Almost, once every week, I tell the teacher the correct pronunciation of my daughter’s name. For me, her name is her identity and I want her to be associated with it. The school is only one formal place where her official name is used. When the teacher, after several reminders could not pronounce her name correctly, it is correct for her to expect my child to be fluent in everything? Not to forget the way she was rejected to perform for a school event and the emotional impact it had on my child and myself.

If you are going through a tough time due to Covid 19 in which you are expected to perform well professionally and at the same time you have to take care of your home, children and other family members. The situation is same with your child too, they are expected to perform well in their respective classes, they are expected to behave in certain manner at home and often they are unable to express their feeling.

Learning is not about scoring marks in school. The ability to deal with the situation is also important and this is the time for you to make your child understand this, that the purpose of this pandemic.

Take care and talk with your children.